You huddled masses

For all you tired, poor and huddled masses yearning to breathe free after a long, hard, long (did I say long?) American presidential campaign - I bring you BRITISH POLITICS.

Yes, believe it or not there is politics out there and it's just as crazy - let's just look at a few developments this week.

1. London Top CoP gets the sack.

Mayor of London, Boris Johnson (whom I supported) schemed and machinated to get the "top cop" Ian Blair ousted from his position as Commissioner of the Metropolitan Police.

Labour Take: Ian Blair was a really cool guy and bad, bad Boris was sneaky and mean to him and hurt his feelings and fired him and we're all really pissed off because he was such a good guy.

As a recap, Ian Blair was the guy who was at the top when Jean Charles de Menezes was shot at Stockwell tube station. At first, I defended the Met, 'cause we knew for a fact there were a bunch of crazies running around trying to kill us, some had succeeded (7/7) and some were not so good at the mixing of the chemicals (21/7). And then an innocentBrazilian was shot (22/7). Alright it was a crazy time, mistakes happen. Inexcusable mistakes, but a mistake. The Met were prosecuted under Health and Safety law, and got a wee slap on the wrist. Ian Blair challenged that laughable prosecution when he should have just sucked it up.

Ian Blair was also the guy who said the media overreacted to the death of two little girls murdered by a sexual predator in Soham 'cause they weren't black. I'm not saying that crime against black people isn't reported in the same way, I don't know, but how the hell were the parents of Holly Wells and Jessica Chapman supposed to feel about that?

Ian Blair is the guy who is under investigation for handing some kind of lucrative contract to a pal.

Same guy whose whole department seems to be alleging racial discrimination and harassment against him. I don't know if there's truth to it, but you don't generally find charges like that in a place that's well managed.

Labour is spinning and spinning against Boris on this one, saying he didn't follow the rules. (It's not entirely at his discretion to remove the Met Commissioner). But seems to me like he did. Boris, as chair of the Metropolitan Police Authority, has the ability to call for a vote of no confidence. Then between the MPA and the Home Secretary (a Labour politician) they can remove him. The Mayor was about to call for a vote of no confidence and Ian Blair resigned before that could happen. Not so sneaky, sounds to me.

My take: Good riddance to bad rubbish. Though he did help bring back neighbourhood policing, which was good thing. He didn't seem to me he had the confidence of his force anymore or many Londoners. Buh-bye.

2. Gordon Brown is still a loser

Yes, people still don't like Gordon Brown. He's re-shuffled his cabinet. I won't bore American readers with the names of the comings-in and the goings-out. But there were two things of note:

2a The return of Peter Mandelson. I don't expect folks in America to know who he is, but he's a kind of shadowy master of the dark spin and an architect of the New Labour Project. Think Karl Rove of the Left. He helped Tony Blair win and win and the Tone rewarded him with Cabinet positions, which he had to resign twice because of corruptiony stuff (like no interest loans and so on). When he had to go the second time, he got some kind of sinecure in European Government which is a real opportunity to root around in the trough.

Well, he's baaaack. He and Gordo never got along it's not unfair to say they were politcal enemies in the constant power struggle between Blair and Brown, but I guess Brown felt he needed Mandy's sneaky charms. He's now got a position in Cabinet - as Business Minister. A real shocker. I guess keep your friends close and your enemies closer is the theme of this gov reshuffle.

2b A whole brand new ministry!!!! One of things that has never ceased to amaze me is the constant merging, coagulating, separating and invention of whole ministries and government departments. It's kinda my job to keep up with these things and it absolutely makes my head spin. For example, the department that I most often deal with has gone from:

DXYZ to DWZY to OXZP and then DCXG while several of its functions have been shipped off to the DLRR and then DERZ and DSKN. WTF? (Note: these aren't real departmental acronyms, but it matters not.)

Apparently the brand new Department of Energy and Climate Change is sucking the energy out of BERR and taking the heat out of DEFRA.

Until now, the Department for Business, Enterprise and Regulatory Reform (Berr) had responsibility for the nation's energy strategy and ensuring the lights did not go out, while the Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs (Defra) had the task of trying to curb the rise of greenhouse gases and ensuring energy was used more efficiently.

What I want to know is this: Precisely what is the carbon footprint of setting up a brand new government department?

Gordon Brown is going down

Gordon Brown, the British Prime Minister, is enjoying personal approval ratings that would make George Bush snicker with comparative glee. I'd bet a higher percentage of the UK population has the clap than think Gordo is doing a good job.

In British political life, you don't wait every four years to have a convention. No, they have one every year. I guess that's the benefit of having a small country. All the big parties do it. And the leader of the party has to give a big speech, and one of those leaders will be the Prime Minister.

And you know what, they don't broadcast the speeches prime time. Mostly because the speeches aren't given in prime time. They happen in the day. Sure, you can catch it on tv, but it interrupts a cookery show or some show where you go through your house and sell off your valuable goods to finance a trip the Gran Canaria or some such. And frankly, most people are at work while these are going on.

Like me. I was at work when Gordon Brown gave his big headline speech today. This was the speech that was supposed to save his political career. This was make or break time. Pundits were saying that he needed to have "an Obama moment" to turn around his political fate.

On tv tonight, many of those pundits were reporting that he'd done it. Or at least, that he'd given a great speech. The speech of his life, blah, blah, blah. And then they'd interview some Labour party goon, some former press under-secretary in the Blair government, or some Broonite loyalist and they said "Wow, what a great speech. He showed what a leader he was." Blah, blah, blah.

Several channels flipped through and all we could hear were people talking about how great his speech was and offering insight. But no clips of the speech. "Show us some of the damn speech," said the Vol-in-Law. We wanted to bask in Gordon's brilliance, too.

Finally, the ViL had sense enough to turn to the Parliament channel. It's a little like I remember C-SPAN, except they rarely seem to show sub-committee meetings live. In fact, they always seem to have happened months in the past. Not sure what that's about. But they were showing Gordon Brown's speech just as we flipped to it. In fact, I think we caught most of it.

Obama moment, my arse. Barack Obama is an incredibly gifted public speaker. Even when he's talking shite it sounds pretty good. Gordon Brown, not so much. Not even close. Not even in the same solar system. Not even when Gordon Brown is talking sense.

But Gordon Brown wasn't talking sense. He made some sneering jabs at the Conservative Party. I'm not sure this is the time to do this. He made some sneering jabs at the "novices" who want to take over from him. He said some really lame stuff about the economy and how the Tories would end all regulation of the financial markets. Gordon Brown wanted to make us believe that he's the right man to handle the economic chaos, but instead he sounded like the pompous bloke at the pub who tries to make himself look smarter by distorting other people's points. And he did it not very well.

No wonder they couldn't show any clips of the speech. It would have showed just how full of it the political reporters are.

Nothing personal

In the UK, there's a system whereby you can get tax relief on your income spent on childcare. It's actually worth a fair bit of money, which is good because child care here is incredibly expensive. But like everything New Labour does, the process is complicated. I have to "surrender" my income to some third party private sector company and fill out forms and blah, blah, blah.

Since I'm top rate tax payer, it makes sense for me to surrender the maximum amount I'm allowed under current regulations. I was trying to sort it out today and the person in the customer service centre told me that if the allowance was raised in the next budget, I would automatically have an increased amount taken from my paycheck (which is a good thing).

I said "They probably won't raise it, Gordon Brown* hates me."
Call centre woman: "It's not you, Gordon Brown hates everyone."

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*Gordon Brown - current UK Prime Minister formerly Chancellor of the Exchequer (financial supremo). He's not supposed to be in charge of the Budget and Government finances anymore, but everyone knows the current chancellor Alistair Darling is Gordon's muppet.

Gold vs. Lead

Prime Minister Gordon Brown has made a surprise stop-over in Afghanistan on his way to China to see out the closing of the Olympics and accept the torch (or the giant public spending bill or whatever it is) for London's 2012 Olympics.

I guess he wanted to rouse the troops - so here's what he said:

"This week we are celebrating the Olympics where we have had great success. People have been winning medals in areas where we have been breaking ground. But this week also I believe that our Olympic athletes and everybody else in our country will remember that you have showed exactly the same courage, professionalism and dedication. "

Yep.

I'm not dismissing the efforts of Olympic athletes. I know they have what I don't - and that's not just the talent bit, the inherited athletic ability - they have a drive and determination that I'm lacking.

But courage? Sorry, did I miss the Olympic event called Taliban Fire Fight? Was IED Dodge just too early in the morning to broadcast?

Crisis, what crisis

Labour suffered landslide losses in the local elections last night. It looks like the Prime Minister is in trouble. Well, it looked like Gordon Brown was in trouble before, but now there's some hard data.

For American readers, many folks in England elected some of their local councillors last night. Not the whole country, just some areas, and in some councils - just some councillors. (I know it's confusing). So you might say that it's not really a referendum on Gordo - but it is. And it is because in this country, local areas are where politicians traditionally have been grown - where a cadre of footsoldiers are what can win and lose you a general election.

And especially, when it looks like Labour may have been pushed into third place (behind the hopeless LibDems) and the Conservatives are winning seats in places where - as a BBC radio presenter put it - I didn't know there were any Tories there.

According to the beeb:

BBC research suggests the party has fallen into third place nationally with 24% of the vote, beaten by the Tories on 44% and Lib Dems on 25%.

So far they are the worst local poll results for Labour in 40 years.

But the party's chief whip Geoff Hoon told the BBC there was "no crisis" for Prime Minister Gordon Brown in the lead-up to the next general election.

Geoff Hoon says "no crisis" - what a loon, that Mr Hoon.

The Mayor of London

No return as yet. Fingers crossed that London follows the national trend.

The ten pence punch

In Gordon Brown's last budget as Chancellor he messed around with the tax bandings - that is he adjusted marginal rates. He announced it as a tax cut. For some - mostly those of higher than median wages, it genuinely was. But for the very low paid, it was tax hike. The first level of taxation was at 10% - quite a low rate of income tax - and to me absolutely right that the first tranche of taxable income should be taxed at a low rate - to reduce the burden on the low paid. Gordon Brown's budget essentially doubled that rate of tax for the working poor. Interestingly enough, the press failed to pick up on it for a day or two and spun Gordon's spin as if they were paid hacks. But here's what I wrote about it:

Anyway, Gordo likes to make out that he's a swell and generous kind a guy. Sure, he taxes the rich, but only to give to the poor - especially the poor little tots.

Only it's a terrible lie and his current budget is a prime example. The headlines all read that he's cut the basic tax rate, but he's managed to actually increase the taxes on the very low paid while reducing taxes on those earning over $100,000.

Labour will tell you that the very low paid with children can always apply for tax credits. Sure, but you're forced to apply as a supplicant to Gordon Brown and entangle yourself into a notoriously knotty bureacracy. (The Treasury admitted only last week the system of credits was baffling.) But the point is that the young and potentially aspirational folks on low wages are hit with yet another Gordon Brown sucker punch.

This country has long had a problem of keeping people mouldering away on benefits - de-skilling and degenerating. For many it doesn't pay to work. With the abolition of the 10 pence marginal rate it pays even less.

And surely, if Labour is to stand for anything, it must be for labour - you know - the workers - and not screwing them out of the wages they earn cleaning toilets, stocking shelves and picking up trash by the side of the road.

Most Labour politicians and left-wing pundits were oddly silent on the matter. And they've kept schtum for nearly a year. If I were to be charitable, I would say that they'd perhaps been kept silent by the party whips - told to shut up until Gordon's coronation last summer, then to zip their lips until Autumn election (which didn't happen), then to twiddle their thumbs until this year's budget was announced in case this error was corrected.

But the current chancellor Alistair Darling - on orders from the true head of the exchequer no doubt - has decided to go ahead and scrap the 1o p rate.

This is bad policy. Here's something I wrote about that a while ago.

The point is, of course, that everyone has to start somewhere. And unless you're the privileged child of wealth, the place you start is at a very low wage job. You work your way up. And you should be rewarded for trading a life of penurious leisure for penurious labor by keeping as much of your wage as possible when you're at that rough, rotten bottom rung of the economic ladder.

It's not as if the low-paid don't pay taxes. They pay a lot of tax (proportionately). They pay taxes on goods and services. They are almost certainly paying other payroll taxes (FICA in the US, National Insurance in the UK). And they can't escape the taxman with sheltered income and offshore accounts.

I believe in the hand up, not the handout. But forcing the poor to hand-over disproportionately, making their precarious situation all the more tottering is just wrong.

Now the Labour back benches are in turmoil. And they should be. Gordon Brown is concerned only so much as in threatens his (weakening) grip on power - but still refuses to acknowledge the harm this policy will do.

Shame on him.

Snap back

Last week, I'd barely posted about the possibility of a snap election and Gordon Brown ruled it out. There won't be an autumn election, after all. I guess it shows how much I've become acclimatised to political life in England. I couldn't fathom the notion of an autumn election. Oh, pounding the pavements (the sidewalks) in the waning light, the slick layer of damp autumn leaves underfoot, knocking up voters in the gathering gloom. (American readers - that merely means knocking on their doors and asking them to vote.)

But of course, in America we do have Autumn elections. In November - gloomy, gloom, gloom. But it's a lot different when all you have to do is mail your ballot in on time. Even the campaigning we do as expats (there are at least a quarter of million votes in this country) is largely over by the end of September and is darn right wrapped up by the time we lose daylight savings.

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Speaking of gloomy, gloom, gloom- the press now senses weakness in the Prime Minister Gordon Brown. He was accused of bottling it by calling off the election. And then this week, in the pre-budget report (a sneak preview of the budget announcement later on), the new Chancellor Alistair Darling announced tax policies which had been proposed a mere days earlier at the Conservative Party Conference. The tiniest of tweaks and it's Government policy. Now one could say that this was Darling's doings - as he's supposed to be in charge of matters financial. But no one believes that Gordon Brown, who until recently held that same job for 10 years, doesn't retain complete control over his old domain.

Now, I don't mind - because on one policy I'm fairly neutral (a poll tax for non-domiciled residents) and on the other (a rollback on the inheritance tax) - I'm in favor, though it's not likely to benefit me given the crap financial position of my in-laws. But it does look like blatant political plagiarism - and since these same tax cuts could have been part of an election budget, well it looks like Labour has run out of ideas of their own. And for once the press called them on it.

Shadow Chancellor George Osborne used the announcements to goad Gordon Brown about his decision to abandon thoughts of a snap election.

He said: 'We all know this report was brought forward so it could be the starting gun for the campaign, before you took the pistol and fired it into your foot. (Metro, 9 October)

Of course, they still seem to have got away without many commenting that it's a set of measures that will actually raise taxes over all. It's a strange political magic this Government seems to have, I don't know how they do it.

On Wednesday, in a sad attempt at humor, Gordon Brown pointed derisively to a petition on the Downing Street Website calling for an autumn election. It had only 26 signatures then. The next day it had over 8,000. Gordon, Gordon, Gordon - don't call attention to things online that you're just trying to dismiss.

Everything the PM does now just looks a little bit lame. I knew this would happen eventually, because he is a man of limited soul, a control freak who just isn't as smart as he thinks he is and he hates fun. But the Labour party faithful are surprised. Surprised, but they're noticing. Here Iain Dale highlights left wing faithful Polly Toynbee sticking the boot in to Gordon. Et tu, Polly?

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Although the Downing Street petition website does nothing and seems to influence policy not at all, I still think it's a nice idea. As blogger-supreme Iain Dale once suggested, (if I recall correctly and I'm paraphrasing) it would be a fine thing if say the top ten petitions were presented daily or weekly to the Prime Minister. I agree. There needn't be an obligation to do anything with the petitions, since these things are obviously subject to manipulation and internet chicanery - but yes, folks in power should be looking at these on a regular basis.

Can you imagine a similar thing for the White House or the Governor's mansion? Power to the People.

Eye contact

Yesterday I was hanging about with a senior civil servant (very senior) and some other high muckety-mucks.

They were going on about how the Labour party - and indeed Britain - would miss Tony Blair when he was gone. That is, we'd miss him in comparison after we've had a while with the dour Gordon Brown (the current Chancellor and heir apparent to the UK Premiership). They talked about Tony Blair's superstar quality - how he lights up a room, how after he's smiled at you, you want to swear off washing.

The civil servant said he'd been in a teeny-tiny lift with Gordon Brown and Brown didn't look at him, didn't make eye contact and didn't even say hello. This to a man who'd been in hours long meetings with the Chancellor and was just about to be in a two-hour meeting with him again.

I don't like Gordon Brown, but I had to acknowledge that I'd do something like that. Not every day, mind, but on one of my bad days I'd be quite likely to do something just like that. The senior civil servant was flabbergasted. I can understand why he felt that way - he doesn't know me and I was doing some presenting and facilitating yesterday - and was very much "on" - friendly and confident. But I've stood in line at the local grocery store next to a quite senior regulator, who I know and like and have worked on projects with and not looked at or acknowledged him until forced to. That was on a bad day. I wasn't deliberately blanking him, though. Truth be told, I didn't actually recognise him til he kinda waved his hand in front of my face.

I don't want to be like that. I just know that I sometimes am. That's why I can't go into politics - at least not in a "face" position. On a bad day, I'd offend constituents. Without meaning to. So I understand Gordon Brown, maybe, but unlike him I wouldn't dream of becoming a politician.

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My husband says that he has a lift-recognition policy. The Vol-in-Law says he will acknowledge, smile and say hello to anyone in an elevator that he recognises by face or anyone who is wearing a suit. He says this has always worked out for him.

See ya

Gordon Brown, the current Chancellor of the Exchequer (Treasury Secretary) and heir-apparent to Tony Blair, will likely take the crown before the year is out. A dour Scot and prone to worry, this time he's going on about the dissolution of the Union.

Yes, well he should worry. A Scot and a Scottish MP who wishes to rule o'er England, too. The Union between the crowns of Scotland and England will this year be 300 years old, but nobody's celebrating. The Union is in peril and Gordo knows that as the Union goes - so goes his future.

I know I'm not a citizen of this country and even if I were I could never be English, but I have to say "Na, na, na, na, hey, hey, hey goooood-bye." See ya, Scots. I, for one, have had enough of your English-bashing, your whinging and your scrounging. Take your bloody depleting North Sea oil and go. See how long you can keep your high-spending, low-producing Socialism without English subsidy. I'm tired of being bossed around by people who are even pastier than the English.

I've always regretted the prohibition of the possibility of secession in US Constitution. It seemed to lack a certain openness to the potentiality of irreconcilable differences. I hope the Scots seize their opportunity for rerendum for independence - and that they don't dally.