Today I was in a well-known British drugstore chain. I was looking at a display of nappies/diapers for newborns that were on sale. They were a pretty decent price, so I was considering getting some. A woman in conservative islamic garb sort of sidled up to me and in broken English asked me if I thought these would be the right size for a new baby.
Now, if you've been reading my Cletus countdown posts, you'll have come to the conclusion that I really don't know nothin' about no babies - and my parenting plan is to just wing it. But I thought these diapers - size 1 newborn - were probably likely to fit a new baby (any baby from 5 to 9 pounds). I had a look at this woman's protruding belly and took a wild guess that she wasn't likely to be delivering a horribly pre-term baby and told her that I thought it was OK and kind of explained why. She barely understood me. I don't think she could read (probably not in her native language either). My guess is that she was brought to England through an arranged marriage.
I can't imagine what her life must be like. She's probably one of the lucky ones. At least she was out and about without chaperone (sometimes Muslim women are encouraged not to leave the house without a male relative). But here she is, without much English, getting ready to bring home a baby and trying to negotiate the National Health Service and probably expecting her first child. It must be a horribly frightening experience.
I have to admit that I found negotiating the pre-natal care in Britain a little bewildering. There was an assumption that I would just understand how the system worked. I had a little meltdown with a midwife one day when she was trying to rush me through an appointment. I had to explain that I didn't know anyone who'd had a baby in England (that wasn't actually true) and so I felt adrift and needed them to explain to me how the system worked instead of just assuming that I knew where I was supposed to be and when. And things are done quite differently than (I think) things are done in the US.
I guess that's part of the reason that I hired another foreigner as a doula (birth consultant). She's German, but remarkably soft spoken and diplomatic for a German. Yeah, I know that's not the same thing as being from my home culture, but at least we can all be foreign together.
19 days til baby Cletus
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
Yes, indeed, it's quite an experience having a baby in England - not bad, I hasten to add, but definitely an experience. Both my sons were born in England and I didn't know anything about the system and like you say, they all assumed that I did. I remember when I was pregnant with my first son that I asked the receptionist (at our GP's surgery) a question about the "booking in" appointment and she shouted at me, "How the heck do I know? I've never had a baby." Charming! My eldest is 18 years old and I still remember that incident like it was yesterday.
Post a Comment